Day Sixteen

Classes like this one make me glad I am taking all levels yoga classes as my avenue towards health rather than Zumba. Every person walking out of the studio from the Zumba class that precedes yoga on Wednesdays was a hot, sweaty mess. One disgruntled yogi had a hard time finding a dry spot on the floor on which to lay his mat. I had no such localization issues as I just lay my mat down directly behind the best looking girl in the class, who promptly decided she would rather take the power class instead. Oh yeah, still got it.

Instructor: Val
Pain level: Orange
Highlight of the class: Finding out the yogi next to me was sporting a purple thong beneath her yoga pants. Remember yogis, no pantie lines! I spent the rest of the class trying to both not stare at it and stare at it at the same time. That's right, I am twelve.
Favorite posture: Kapotasana (pigeon). This was the second consecutive class that concentrated on hip opening and it felt fantastic.
Least favorite posture: Fire hydrant. Yup, still cramps. Maybe someday this will feel good instead of PAIN.

Day Fifteen

We will call this one the hip opener. To the best of my recollection two days later, every posture was meant to open the hips on some level or another. This also marked the second consecutive class when I felt significantly better mentally after class than beforehand. Tracing back through the days it is possible I am just re-affirming that it is a terrible idea to listen to Unearth on my way to yoga. This is unfortunate because it turns out it is always an excellent idea to listen to Unearth.

Instructor: Matt
Pain level: Orange
Highlight of the class: A yogi threatened to throw a block at Matt if he concentrated on hips in class but it was an empty threat since she did not have a block. A helpful fellow yogi offered up her block as a projectile not because she agreed with the protest but because she thought someone should throw a block at Matt.
Favorite posture: Matt took us into a twisted runner's lunge that really stretched the torn abdominal muscle in a good way.
Least favorite posture: Fire hydrant. I am sure there is a fancy Sanskrit term for lifting your leg up like you are a dog about to piss on a fire hydrant but fucked if I can find it. When you are a canine this is a handy way of pointing your stream towards its intended target without the use of opposable thumbs. When you are an alcoholic men's league hockey player this mostly just leads to cramps in your hips.